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Masculinity At Work

Many modern workplaces are dominated by a very specific type of masculinity that can make the office uncomfortable or even hostile to those who don’t fit the characteristics being valued. Masculinity as a workplace norm can not only be exclusionary to women, trans, non-binary, and agender people, it can also exclude and harm men by creating a rigid expectation for how someone is ‘supposed’ to act, dress, spend time, and present ideas in the workplace.

Until the mid-1970s, men made up more than 60% of the civilian labor force in the US. Today, men make up more than 91% of Fortune 500 CEOs. It’s no surprise, then, that the US workplace has in many ways been designed by and for men. This manifests in big and little ways. 

Some of these ways center on sex-based characteristics. Office heating algorithms are based on an average male metabolic rate (thus making the office freezing cold for anyone with lower metabolic rates). So called ‘unisex’ personal protective equipment is often designed for a specific type of male body, and doesn’t work for anyone else. Voice recognition software works best for a specific type of male voice. 

In other ways, office culture is built around social gender norms of what it means to ‘be a man’, in other words - masculinity. To better understand this, and to better understand how we can create inclusive cultures that allow employees of all genders to be their true selves, we’ll look a closer look at what masculinity is, how it is upheld in the workplace, and what you can do about it.

What is masculinity?

Masculinity is the performance of all the attributes and behaviors that are expected of men. It’s all the stuff that people think makes someone a “real man.” This includes things like how men should behave at work, in relationships, the way they should (or shouldn’t) express emotion, what they should wear in different settings, and what types of jobs or interests they should have. Much of it is related to behavior, but it can also be related to physical appearance and assumed sex-based characteristics, such as the ability to grow facial hair. 

Masculinity looks a little different for everyone; lots of cultural and social factors influence it. However, according to the American Psychological Association, there’s generally agreement that the current dominant ‘masculinity’ in the U.S. centers around stoicism, competitiveness, dominance, and aggression. Additionally, traditional masculinity is often tied to cis heteronormative standards - meaning that often society considers men who weren’t assigned male at birth (such as trans men) or men who aren’t straight (like gay, bisexual, pansexual men) to be somehow less “manly.”

You may have heard the term “toxic masculinity” that’s been popping up in the news in recent years. Maybe you remember the controversial Gillette ad or have seen actor and football player Terry Crews speak on the topic. This specifically refers to the emotional suppression and encouragement of violence that many see as part of masculinity in America today, and the harm that this does to men and to those around them.

While toxic masculinity is harmful, masculinity itself isn’t a bad thing. Many people see themselves reflected in certain forms of masculinity, and it can help them find community and bring them a sense of gender congruence and joy in their gender. 

The challenge with masculinity (and femininity for that matter, too) comes when it is exclusionary or prescriptive — and this is what can sometimes happen when workplace norms and culture are shaped by certain ideas of traditional masculinity.

How does masculinity show up in the workplace? 

There are many ways in which professional life and professional spaces are shaped by expectations of masculinity. This means there are ways in which traditionally masculine behaviors are rewarded (and with it, often men), but it also means that men (as well as women, non-binary, transgender, and agender people) suffer from unrealistic expectations of how they “should” be at work. 

Here are some of the many ways in which these expectations of traditional masculinity show up in the workplace.

Masculinity & Leadership 

Men still make up about three-quarters of Congress members and S&P 500 board members, and, as mentioned, more than 90 percent of Fortune 500 CEOs. Many leadership qualities are still considered to be highly masculine, and we tend to speak about men and women in leadership positions differently. Men are more likely to be described as analytical and competent while women are more likely to be described as compassionate or enthusiastic — positive qualities, but ones that are less likely to get you promoted.  Certain traits, like being ambitious, are seen as a positive for men and a negative for women. Most people think of a man when they think of a leader. 

Despite this, the vast majority of people think that men and women are equally good leaders in the business and political world, and research suggests that men and women don’t actually behave or perform that differently at work.(Note that this research does not include anyone outside of the binary such as trans, non-binary, and agender people.) 

The norm that professional behavior and leadership are inherently masculine in a specific way hurts everyone. Women in leadership positions face backlash and feel they have to find a balancing act for their behavior. Trans, non-binary, and agender people may feel pressure to present as more masculine (or to present as strictly within the binary, and hide their true gender). But these norms harm men, too. Case in point: male CEOs get paid more when they have deep, “manly” voices. Pervasive, harmful beliefs that homosexual men are more feminine than heterosexual men means that some gay men intentionally lower their voices and wear more masculine clothing at work to avoid being seen as feminine. Men who would like to wear clothing or colors traditionally considered feminine face harassment and are denied opportunities. Men who display vulnerability, empathy, and kindness in the workplace may in fact be penalized for exhibiting these behaviors.

Networking and ‘Work Outside of Work’

Socializing outside of work can be a great way for a team to bond and build trust. But when and where does this socialization take place? If it requires money and time spent outside of work, it may be excluding people — particularly people who have caregiver responsibilities (often women). The traditionally masculine realm of power lunches and golf games with clients may be on the decline, but networking still often happens at traditionally masculine activities, like playing or watching sports and grabbing after work beers.

Of course these activities aren’t necessarily enjoyed more by one gender or another, but their association as masculine may mean that some people won’t be invited, or may make others – even and especially men who are “expected” to share these interests — feel excluded or uncomfortable.  

Men may have easier access to their bosses who are (often) men, and the ability to schmooze with their boss helps them get promotions and raises. The same is not true for women (or for men whose bosses are women). Sharing activities and interests means men get more face time with their boss. This means that, depending on the bosses’ interests and activities, specific types of men advance (and may be incentivized to feign enthusiasm for something that has nothing to do with their job), and may leave behind many other men, women, trans, non-binary, and agender people.

Missing out on networking opportunities can certainly be a disadvantage for women with children, but it is often more expected. Men who prioritize their families face workplace harassment and mistreatment because they are seen as less masculine and less committed to their jobs (for more, see Work/Life Balance and Family below). 

Masculinity Contests

Harvard Business Review research coined the term ‘Masculinity Contest Culture’, which “endorses winner-take-all competition, where winners demonstrate stereotypically masculine traits such as emotional toughness, physical stamina, and ruthlessness. It produces organizational dysfunction, as employees become hyper-competitive to win.” 

This culture is dominant in industries dominated by men, including tech, finance and all the sectors still described as a “boy’s club.” Women, trans and non-binary, and agender people are at an immediate disadvantage and may have to work harder to prove themselves (and may be at higher risk for sexual harassment, which proliferates in these types of cultures). But “boy’s club” doesn’t mean all “boys.” Men are forced into a very narrow box, and any man who doesn’t quite fit the hyper-masculine behavior of the office may similarly be subject to exclusion and at risk for harassment.

Work/Life Balance and Family 

Many workplaces are increasingly looking for ways to encourage work/life balance, and accommodate working parents. However, this has been driven in part by more women entering the workplace in recent decades, and doesn’t always take into consideration men’s private lives and roles within their families. Family leave policies and norms around taking leave still often lay bare an underlying belief that women are, or should be, the primary caretakers in their families, and that men should prioritize work and serve as the primary “breadwinner.” 

Men who spend more time on childcare than their peers, seek out flexible working arrangements, and take family leave are often seen as ‘unmanly’ and not adequately committed to their jobs. They may experience harassment, lower pay, and worse career outcomes. 

The positive benefits of men taking parental leave abound (lower divorce rates! More equitable parenting roles! Improved relationships with their children!). But seventy percent of fathers take ten days of leave or less following the birth or adoption of a child. Many organizations don’t offer significant parental leave for men, but even when they do, men often don’t take all of it. This is partly due to the negative impacts mentioned above: men face negative career outcomes if they take leave, but also because parental leave in the US is often not fully paid, and most families cannot afford to forego income for a significant period of time.   

People of all genders (including men) are impacted by the ways in which traditionally masculine norms shape the workplace. By unpacking this, we can make the workplace a more equitable, inclusive place for everyone.

4 things you can do 

  • Examine what you think of as leadership traits - are any of them gendered? Review and, as necessary, revise your performance review process and promotion criteria to minimize gender bias.
  • You can’t necessarily control where employees socialize outside of work, but for workplace events, don’t stick to one place or one time. Happy hour might exclude people who don’t feel comfortable in the bar setting, or who have to rush home to take care of kids or elderly family members. Include late morning coffee breaks or team lunches (make them free), and make team retreats or meetings outside of work family friendly. Take anonymous suggestions from employees for ideas! 
  • Watch for a culture of masculinity contests. Read this HBR article to learn more. This can be countered by establishing a strong organizational mission and workplace culture. Encourage collaboration over ‘winners vs. losers’, do not encourage or reward working extra hours, promote work/life balance, and put in place strong harassment policies. 
  • Review your parental and family leave policies. Get rid of the idea of ‘primary caregivers’ - recognize that caregiving work is (and should be) shared equally. The best way to make sure men are taking parental leave is to make it fully paid, and some countries have had luck with use-it-or-lose-it paid leave policies. Make sure senior management is setting a good example of creating a family-friendly culture. Encourage senior leaders, especially men, to take family leave and talk about their families. Just be sure your leave policies aren’t reinforcing the idea of gender binaries (aka, that they aren’t only written for ‘mothers’ and ‘fathers,’ leaving behind non-binary and agender employees). 

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